Writing Every Which Way

Novels, poems, and writing tips


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Why being a teenage author sucks

Don’t get me wrong, being a teenager and writing books is great! The look of astonishment and concern when you tell someone you’re 17 and have two published novels is gratifying. Having so much free time to write is amazing. Having 700 people in a high school to beg to read your book is a gift. Alas, like any coin, there are always too sides.

Seeing as I’m a teenager in the middle class who has no job because high school is a (excuse my language) bitch, I don’t necessary have the greatest following and here’s why.

1. Teenagers are stingy.

Teenagers usually either don’t have a job at all, or don’t have much money coming in from their job. It’s not that they don’t want to fork over $0.99 it’s just that they don’t see a point in giving their money to some student author who’s book could be crap for all they know.

2. I don’t have a job.

A day in the life of Madison Uram is generally busy. I’m not saying I go home to three kids, have to make dinner, give the dog a bath, and pack everyone’s lunches. I’m saying that I have to finish up my after school activities (directing a One-Act play), I have to consume dinner, finish homework, and try to keep my life situated in the meantime. Once all that is done, there’s no time for a job and who would hire a 17 year-old girl with no experience? Not you.

Why do I need a job? First off, publishers expect drafts to be submitted by an agent and without an agent self-publishing is basically your only choice. Then, if you want to run ads you have to pay money which I have minimal of because I’m trying to pay for prom. And lastly, to even put your novel on iTunes you need to pay for a memebership… AKA why I’m not on iTunes. Sorry.

3. Literally no one cares.

I can scream from the rooftop until my voice is gone about my novels, but I promise you that I will be extremely lucky if even one person buys my novel. This isn’t a pity party, it’s just how people are.

Has someone every advised a TV series to watch for you and despite the fact that it sounds perfect for you, you’re just too darn stubborn to watch it?

That’s how everyone feels about novels.

No matter how blown away they are that you wrote a novel, they don’t have the time or care to read it. And I can’t even blame them. I’ve read the short stories and poems my friends have written and if I heard one of them had written a novel, I wouldn’t pay money for it either.

Long story short, I love writing and I love when people read my book, I just wish more people would! If you feel the same, leave a comment below telling me of your plight. If you pity me, here’s the link to buy The Little Paragons and here’s the link to buy The Little Villains vvvvvvvv

The Little Paragons

The Little Villains

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How to promote your book while annoying everyone you know…

The struggle self-published authors are very familiar with, is the task of getting people to actually read their book. I mean, no doubt there are hundreds of Best Sellers out there that aren’t Best Sellers yet because it’s impossible to get an audience cheaply. You either have to pay a bajillion dollars for ads or annoy everyone you know with shameless self-promotions.

Seeing as I’m a 17 year old trying to survive high school, I’m in the portion of the self-published author population that drives everyone crazy.

Now, it’s probably become prominent at this point that as of this morning, my novel The Little Villains is available on Amazon.com. I’m thrilled that the year and a half of work has paid off, but now I’m faced with a problem: how do I convince people to buy it?

Here’s what I did:

  1. Made an extremely annoying post on every social media platform I own. Yes, that includes everything from Snapchat and Facebook to Instagram and my blog. Annoying? yes. Necessary? No doubt.
  2. Became a walking billboard. Thanks to my brother and his skills with an iron, I was able to acquire some t-shirts featuring the covers of my two novels. I consequently begged one of my friends to wear one and it got a good bit of attention.
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    Disregard me being an idiot.

  3. Put myself out there in front of my high school. My school has a morning announcements class devoted to creating funny videos and filming a news broadcast that includes the daily announcements. Due to my love for the film industry, I am in said class and decided to anchor for the day wearing aforementioned billboard shirt.
  4. I didn’t shut up. The shirt was a good conversation starter and once people saw that they usually asked how I managed to write a book and what it was about. From there I would persuade them to buy my book! Screaming “Buy my book!” also helps.

In total, I see nothing wrong with being extremely annoying when it comes to promoting a self-published novel. Self-published authors put just as much (and sometimes more) effort into creating our masterpieces, and we’re overlooked because we can’t afford fancy advertisements or simply just don’t want to take that route. Who can blame us for accidentally driving all our friends and family insane for one day?

 


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“The Little Villains” is available for purchase!

As of last midnight (and early this morning due to me noticing one last typo that made my OCD go crazy), The Little Villains is available for purchase from Amazon.com!

Feel free to let me know what you think by leaving a comment on Amazon. And remember, any publicity is good publicity when it comes to novels.

Also, thank you so much to everyone who has supported me while writing this novel. It has sure been one eventful year and a half with this project. So thank you everyone! I hope you love it as much as I do.

Love you all,

Madi Uram

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The Little Villains available now!


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Almost done!

Coming out this Friday will be my second novel: The Little Villains. This book is the sequel to my first novel: The Little Paragons and will be available for purchase on Amazon.com!

If you want to learn more about either of my books click here.

If you want to purchase The Little Paragons click here.

Stay tuned for more information 🙂

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The Little Villains. Coming out this Friday.


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The Little Paragons: A book blurb

“Once Upon a Time” lost meaning when that ‘time’ became now for three teenagers. Pulled towards Die Bibliothek, a mysterious village that appeared almost in their back yards, the phrase becomes part of their daily vocabulary. The three enter a world where they must become the characters of their childhood stories and correct them from their recently corrupted states.

Gabe Wolfwood simply wanted a more exciting life but got a bit more than he asked for when he found himself portraying the roles of kings, princes, and street rats. He’s forced to keep the stories morally Good but when the embodiment of Evil is trying to stop him, he and his friends hit a snag in finding “happily ever after”.

His life, he begins to notice, is more like a young adult novel than he ever wanted or expected.

Read the first chapter


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The Little Villains and my life: an update

 

December was a BUSY month for me… Not only did I decide to crochet my brothers mermaid tails for Christmas, but I cross-stitched them a poster with a list of reasons I don’t miss them… (They just moved out). I promise I’m not a horrible sister. The joke was very much appreciated.

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They love me, I promise.

 

December was also spent prepping for my High School’s musical auditions for Shrek. Yours truly managed to… somehow… get the role of Pinocchio and I can’t be more excited. Also, the nerd in me is super pumped to be playing a fairy tale character when I spend hours writing about fairy tales in my novels!

Speaking of said novels, The Little Villains is on it’s way. The deadline was pushed back due to some editing mishaps and now I’m back to work. If I’m lucky, The Little Villains will be available for purchase by the end of January. Keep your fingers crossed.

Meanwhile, I’d love to hear how everyone else’s Christmas break and writing has been going. I have about 80 new books to read, but feel free to give me some more suggestions. I’m sure I’ll find a way to get around to all of them!

Happy Holidays and Happy New Year if I don’t get around to posting in the next two days.

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The Little Villains. Soon to be published


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Face-lifts and new beginnings

Today is a big day in the world of The Little Paragons! Not only did The Little Paragons get a face-lift, but The Little Villains now has a face!

My talented brother, Mr. Austin Uram, spent hours putting together two new covers for my first two novels and I couldn’t have been happier. So, without further ado I present to you the new covers of The Little Paragons and The Little Villains.

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The title reveal

I promise I’m still alive! 7024132827_271cee7a99_b

As many of you know, it’s my senior year of high school and I’m going to be honest with you and say that everything that could go wrong has. I’m not acting like the end of the world is coming, but it sure has been rough. Maybe it’s just me, though, I mean the only excitement I’m used to is sitting around and writing.

Things seemed to be turning in a good direction now, though. Thanksgiving break is only a day away and I’m hoping to be less MIA this next month or so. It feels good to write again so I’m sure I’ll be around.

Also, my sequel is almost ready for publishing so I’ll definitely be keeping everyone informed on that. It was just the other day that I remembered I was supposed to release my title nearly a month ago! Did that happen? Nope! So here’s the moment of truth! The moment I’m sure EVERYONE has been waiting for has arrived!

The sequel to The Little Paragons is:

The Little Villains

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Yes, that’s probably not as thrilling as you were hoping for, but it’s better than nothing!

(I refuse to apologize for my memes)


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Treat Yo’ self

I’ve watch way too many episodes of “Glee” in the last 48 hours and I can’t find it in me to be ashamed. I mean, now that my novel The Little Paragons is in stage two of editing, I kind of don’t have much to do. I keep telling myself I need to get back to work on my blog, but I go back to school on the 1st and ain’t nobody got time for blogging when there are six seasons of “Glee” and only a day left!

I’m sure once my good ol’ senior year begins I’ll get into a better routine of blogging, but as for right now, I’m sure the world can suffice with just a brief update on my writing every which way day.

As I said earlier, I got copies printed of my sequel and they’ve been passed along to my

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“I could kill a man with my 2nd novel”

editors. These copies are about 250 pages thick and today, upon spotting them on my desk, my brother remarked, “What the f***?” multiple times before ambling away in confusion…

 

I was a little taken by surprise as well when I discovered that with all the formatting and extra stuff, this novel is almost twenty pages longer than The Little Paragons… oops.

Meanwhile, I’ve started trying to figure out what the heck I’m supposed to do for the third and final book. I have the ending mapped out and I have some scenes in mind, but, as a scholarly man once said, “What the f***?”

All in favor of winging it say aye?

Aye.


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251 pages, 105,775 words, and 552,821 characters… and counting

There are 7 days left before The Little Paragons sequel moves into the next stage of editing! I’ve been editing fifty pages a day (from a total of 251) and things are moving smoothly. I feel less inclined to throw up over my own writing after ever round.

I’m not entirely sure what my plan is for the month or so that it takes my “editors” (my mom and book addict best friend) to do their job. The crazy psycho part of me wants to work on outlining my third book, but the teenager about to start senior year cringes at that idea… I may just use the time to do some research for the third book. Perhaps that’ll help the novel form because right now I’m not entirely sure what my plan is.

But hey, I still have 7 days to go and 45 pages left to edit tonight so I can’t worry about the future!

If you have yet to check out The Little Paragons, you can do so on Amazon. You’ve got mere months until the second novel is out, but it’s never too early to start a new novel 😉